Monday, September 26, 2011


I wanna join a cause and raise awareness maybe for AiDS or deafness or keeping art in schools or something for Africa. I don't yet. I feel like I need something to support and stand for when I'm being major selfless.

Friday, September 2, 2011

Positive Reinforcement

Guys want to say that I'm just acting a fool or I'm jealous or something like insecure.  It's true that everything is not always it seems but can you see it from my side for once?  I met you and that was it. I liked your personality, you got along well with other people, you had good looks you just had it and that was cool. Why wouldn't I get a crush on you and then try to do something about it? When I did do something, we became an item. Now, before we got together I knew your were a people person (or flirt whichever applies) so it wasn't quite a surprise but maybe I just needed some reinforcement because I was the girlfriend now, not just a friend any longer. You know a lot of people (saying "practically everybody" would be slightly exaggerated) and when those people are girls it's like a threat, a minor threat JUST because they don't know me.  I don't think of anything outrageous like you cheating or something but it's kind of like an uncomfortable feeling (just in the beginning of a relationship) seeing other girls approach you and not knowing if I have to compete with them or not. Like not knowing if I can keep your interest or maybe you get bored fast. Maybe you like risks and I'm too safe for you. Maybe... she sees you like I saw you before we were together, I liked you, I did something about it, now we're together maybe she likes you and she thinks she can do something about that. I don't assume anything is going on but that still kind of plays in the back of my mind. It's the things that you don't know that trouble you so frequently...